Welcome back to our weekly round-up of the most infuriating bits of anti-LGBT rhetoric to grace our news feeds in the past seven days. And as usual, right-wingers around the world gave us plenty to choose from — our only problem was picking only five outrageous stories to share here. Read on to see what made the cut, but expect a healthy dose of snark in the following pages — sometimes it's the only way we can get through the day.
5. Ugandan 'Scientists' Answer The Age-Old Question: Homos Were Definitely NOT 'Born This Way'
A team of antigay lawmakers "with medical backgrounds" have prepared a report for Uganda's president that claims to have scientific evidence that homosexuality is "culturally acquired" — and curable.
Antigay activists and scientists apparently took to heart Ugandan President Yoweri Museveni's comments last month that he would not sign the country's "Anti-Homosexuality Bill" that imposes lifetime prison sentences on LGBT people, "unless [he] got confirmation from scientists that this condition is not genetic, but a behavior that is acquired."
Less than a week later, a team of "scientists," composed of and backed by the ruling political party known as the National Resistance Movement, prepared a report that claims to prove that homosexuals are made, not born. The lawmakers-turned-quack-scientists are planning to present their report to the president at a 10-day parliamentary retreat.
The team of scientists is composed of lawmakers from the ruling NRM party who have a medical background, reports Uganda's Observer. One of those scientists, who is also a member of parliament, said that he's been engaged in research on the topic for a whole week, and arrived at presumably concrete conclusions.
"From the research that I have engaged in for some time ever since we were assigned by the caucus, I have discovered that there is no gene that is said to produce [homosexuality] as claimed by some people," Medard Bitekyerez told the Observer last week.
Another doctor on the team agreed, stressing his belief that gay people can be turned straight.
"One study revealed that actually 50 percent of the homosexuals revert to heterosexuality if rehabilitated in time," Dr. Kenneth Omona told the Observer. "This, in itself, reveals a behavioral aspect."
LGBT activists in Uganda are mobilizing to offer genuine scientific data to contradict the psuedoscience offered in the lawmakers' report, but they note that President Museveni has so far refused to engage in dialogue with the LGBT community on any level.
Even without the president's signature making the bill law, reports of antigay witch hunts have begun circulating, with news that Minister of Ethics Simon Lokodo has a "homo terror list" with the names of those who he calls "filthy gays that must be brought down," according to a Ugandan academic and LGBT supporter who blogs at SebaSpace. The author notes that Lokodo and his antigay "investigators" are casing homes and bars in suburban Kampala, assisted by Kira Road police officers — who last week ago arrested two men and examined them, without their lawyers present, for supposed "sodomy" after police say they caught them watching "gay porn." That film? Sex and the City.
4. Restaurateur Proudly Denies Service to "Freaks, Faggots," Welfare Queens
Lest we think that outright bigotry has become solely an export of the United States, it's, uh, good? to know there's still some good old-fashioned, unapologetic, down-home hatred being peddled in the U.S. of A. And wouldn't you know, it happens to be demonstrated best by a smiling, proudly bigoted businessman in Oklahoma.
Gary James, who owns Gary's Chicaros restaurant and bar in Enid, Okla., is so confident in his bigotry that he's branded it on the bar's official t-shirts.
James proudly wears t-shirts with racial and gay slurs that threaten violence against Democrats and Islamic people.
"I've been in business 44 years; I think I can spot a freak or a faggot," James proudly told local TV station KFOR. "I really don't want gays around."
KFOR first learned about the blatantly discriminatory — and possibly illegal — service practices after a disabled former patron informed the station that James had kicked him out of the establishment, believing he was on welfare. Gard told KFOR that James also hates African-Americans, Latinos, gays, women, Muslims, and Democrats.
Sound too outlandish to be true? Meet Gary James in the video below, where he politely declines to call the reporter a "chink," unless she gets real rowdy.
Find more outrageous stories on the following pages.