Lost Girl Recap 4.10 - H20: Just Add Doctor
Hi guys, Are we all excited to spend some more time in forgotten memories? How about mermaids? If you're not excited about mermaids I really don't even know what to say to you right now. Maybe I'll just get into the recap and we can discuss this again later.
Waves begins with a blood smeared Bo leaning over a sink and hearing the argument that ensued after last week's admission of her Rainer destiny. The destined one himself approaches and assures her that a mysterious “they” left them no choice. I'm really hoping he's talking about the ketchup fight that broke out causing them both to be stained.
We then join a feisty blonde woman at a very fancy indoor swimming pool as she threatens someone over the phone to ensure her new mobile launch goes ahead. With that sorted she takes a relaxing dip but upon reaching the far edge of the pool struggles to get out of the water. That seems a little strange since she seems a capable enough swimmer. Once she is out of the water both we and her discover the problem: she lost her legs while swimming. How clumsy!
My new favorite doctor-werewolf dream team are chilling at Dyson's gym and while Lauren grudgingly accepts that Bo has locked them out, Dyson wants to intervene. Kenzi brings the team a month's worth of caffeine and our freshly legless friend who is to be their new client. Apparently the three of them are now the private investigating team? I want this to be a thing that happens enough that I am resolved to question it no further.
The legless woman, Diana, was swimming in her corporate pool when the incident occurred so Dyson feels it is likely this was an inside job. Office politics can be so grisly. I am also clearly working for the wrong companies as I would kill to have access to a pool like that even if it did sometimes eat my legs. Diana is perhaps jealous of the team's deliciously epic coffees as she turns down a glass of water and gets straight into talking about the company, Alaria. While she has no knowledge of how the products are made she suggests Darren Clare, the mysterious head of Alaria, is the man they should investigate as he is a keeper of many ominous secrets.
Diana has set up corporate identities for Dyson (efficiency consultant) and Kenzi (mail distribution and maintenance) to infiltrate her workplace and solve the mystery of the missing legs. She warns the team that Alaria uses state-of-the-art heat sensor technology to monitor employees so will be alerted if either of them become distressed. She has also hacked them into that system so that they can monitor other employees for a possible leg-thief. Speaking of thievery, for the first time in weeks we revisit Kenzi's shadow thief training which has thus far only enabled her to steal Lauren's panties. Repeatedly. She's clearly going to be taking the world by storm.
After deserting her friends for the moment Bo is having some second thoughts about this Rainer situation. She tells her new towel-clad destiny-friend that she needs to understand and he holds her hand and we venture into the train of flashbacks. Bo busts in direct from her capture at the end of last season and finds a largely indifferent Rainer who claims he has no knowledge or interest in her kidnapping.
At business HQ Kenzi and Dyson have switched their intended roles and as Kenzi rocks a red business suit, Dyson pushes his mail trolley and Lauren is wired in to both. Dyson attempts to deliver mail to Darren Clare but is informed by his sassy assistant Tad that not even he delivers mail to his boss. Dyson instead places a heat sticker of some sort on the envelope and Kenzi follows it through the vents to a room of legs in jars. It's like Futurama in here but with legs instead of heads. A chute is delivering mail to a tray which Kenzi immediately starts reading and finds some hefty medical bills for Tad featuring words she cannot pronounce.
Meanwhile Dyson is investigating the poolside botanic situation and Lauren identifies a plant as a possible aquatic and requests a sample. He tastes the pool water and identifies it as salt water and also finds a pearl in the filtration system. There seems to be a whole lot more investigating happening in this mission than when Bo is involved. Dyson hasn't seduced a single staff member at Alaria yet.
Over on the flashback train Bo confronts her handmaiden who informs her it will be three days before the next stop and any attempts to exit prior to then will result in her own destruction. Handmaiden proffers a sexy red dress and asks Bo to give Rainer a chance before passing over a dinner invitation. I'm pretty sure I've seen this one before but the handmaiden was a tea pot. Please let them start singing to make her feel at home soon.
At Dyson's gym Lauren identifies the pearl as a crystallized salt deposit. This causes Dyson to freak out because solidified round salt is terrifying to werewolves. Or possibly because his knowledge of all things fae tells him they're facing something worse than they can imagine: mermaids. Kenzi responds as though she's just been invited to a ball at King Triton's palace to make Ariel part of her world. Lauren acts all doctory about it as Dyson again attempts to warn them both of the severity of these finned fiends while agreeing that they should continue to help eradicate them from the corporate pool.
In trains past Bo joins Rainer who has just sat down for a meal. I'm assuming the flatware just stopped entertaining because this episode is clearly a combination of my favorite Disney moments. Bo is less interested in dinner and more there for interrogation and frankly Rainer's just a little petulant about her presence there. Probably because she made the dishes stop singing. Rainer changes his tune a little when he realizes that Bo is a succubus and even more so when she proclaims herself unaligned. When she steals his meal Rainer basically has love hearts glowing in his eyes as he watches her leave as though his own heart was on the plate too.
Kenzi approaches sassy assistant Tad for an efficiency meeting and finds that one area he drags a little in is walking. Because he too has no legs. He explains that a vascular disease forced amputation when he was in college and when his parents could no longer pay his bills Darren stepped in like a knight with shining checkbook. Tad has now made it his mission to protect his boss, especially from the crazies. When he rolls off to a meeting Kenzi reports him not a mermaid and finds the best file name ever in Tad's cabinet.
Rainer is really pulling out all the stops, playing some tunes on the organ in Bo's cabin and giving cryptic answers to questions about board games. He reveals that his power was to see the future in battle and he made it his mission to prevent tyrants from ruling. When Bo asks which tyrant he speaks of Rainer becomes distressed because he has no memory of who cursed him to this life and how he lost his powers. The mystery announcer voice declares an imminent stop as Bo gets that rescuing glint in her eyes and declares that what Rainer is doing is not living.
In present day Kenzi has returned to the leg room to retrieve more information for Lauren and hopefully sneak a peak at a mermaid. Her heat tracker senses a cold figure approaching and a man with absolutely no visible fins enters and makes her choke on some water. He reveals himself as the mysterious Darren and realizes that Tad has been hiding his threatening letters. He says these are all letters from his sister Dominique who is eager for some legs of her own. While he was developing his own above board method of leg attachment, all sourced from willing donors, his sister was preventing Diana from climbing any more ladders, corporate or otherwise. The legs in question come sliding down the chute and Darren explains that the only way to catch his sister will be to draw her out.
Kenzi has just the doctor-shaped bait in mind for some mermaid legs and Dyson hides behind a pole as Lauren enters the water. She activates some sort of mermaid-revealing device that was presumably just lying around her place and the offending mermaid becomes visible. She also appears incapacitated as she half floats and as a wise man once said, flops like a fish.
In the train-back storyline the announcer proclaims two minutes until the station and Bo discovers a small tray containing a butterfly that comes to life when she removes the glass lid. She really is a puzzle to the rest of us. This leads Rainer to decide she is the one for him as she remembers something from her childhood. He tells her to go and begins to go all beast on the room when she leaves but after only a moment's absence Bo returns and gets to know Rainer in her favorite manner.
The offending mermaid Dominique stares longingly at Lauren's legs (and really, who hasn't been there?) before explaining that Darren deserted her after his mermaid walkabout – the right of passage where mermaids can walk the earth for a year.
She sheds a tear that becomes a pearl-esque crystallized saline deposit and declares that with this she has cried enough to kill someone. Her target is not her brother as expected but her sister who promised to bring him back and also never returned – Diana.
At the gym Diana and Darren are catching up as Kenzi prepares them some food. She notes Diana's ice cold hands and realizes she has found herself an unwilling donor of her bottom half. Conveniently Dyson, Lauren and wheelchair-bound Dominique enter before any limbs can be severed or damage done to Kenzi's banging business suit. Darren suggests there are as many legs in the room as they require to be a whole family with a spare set for him to upgrade. Wolf is very trendy this season in merfolk fashion. Lauren doesn't share their excitement over donating legs she's worked hard to get looking that good and pulls out the one antidote to mermaid revolution: tap water. Clearly.
As Bo and Rainer lie in bed discussing the many stops she has now missed he fills her in on her friends activities of the first few episodes of the season. He explains that once Dyson and Kenzi break the compass they will remember her but she will no longer remember him. She explains the trail she has laid to lead herself back to him: the opera singer, Hugin's jar of swirly mist and the contract with the dark. If there's one thing Bo knows about herself it's that she will not take kindly to an unwilling alignment. She claims she will get them both their memories back and if Rainer finds that he is in fact a monster promises she will kill him herself.
With our walk down memory lane over Bo takes Rainer to visit the Una Mens and he does a little card trick that returns his powers. He uses his foresight to see that they are in danger and the Una Mens say he possesses too much power. When Bo calls the council corrupt they state that her blasphemy has condemned all of her friends and then herself to death. When the fighting begins Rainer uses his power to predict all their moves and allow Bo to fight them far more effectively than on previous attempts.
Clean up duty is under way at the gym as Lauren explains that the salty composition of the mermaid pearls, Diana's refusal of a glass of water and the way fresh water killed her aquatic plant was how she discovered the solution to their underwater friends. Kenzi is pleased to still have legs but worried about the lack of communication from Bo and wonders what her succubuddy is getting up to.
The answer to Kenzi's question is some Una Mens murder as now only the speaking keeper of the council remains alive. She has a special way of negotiating for her life, first calling Bo's mother a whore and then threatening all manner of pain and damnation. Bo engages in a little name calling of her own and throws some impaling into the mix.
Back at Bo's house Trick drops by to inform her that under no circumstances should she be talked into any manner of Una Mens slaughter. He warns that if the council die all of their power will be amassed into one seed, the one that was stolen from him weeks ago. As Bo reconsiders her recent decisions we see a bandaged hand reaching for the seed in question and I try really hard not to make any semen jokes.
How did everyone enjoy this one? It felt a little disjointed to me having Bo's story almost entirely in flashback and the case of the week so unrelated to anything larger. On the other hand I will watch Dyson, Lauren and Kenzi be detectives together until the mystical fae-cows come back to this mortal plane. Also there were mermaids! I'm looking forward to finding out where this seed story is going and am suspicious of a certain hand-damaged mesmer's possible involvement. I hope you'll join me next week to talk all about it again!